Apparently, it looks like I'm being a lot more involve with my emotional side lately. For one, I think I'm starting to pay more attention to the people around me nowadays. I mean, Who would have thought that I would actually make an effort in contacting and trying to save friendship(s)....
The "me" 2 years ago wouldn't have believed it, in fact, I think she would roll her eyes and laugh at your face...
But it's true.
Lately, I've been thinking that I really am losing people around me because all these years I couldn't careless about people. My life motto was friends and family come and go, just make new ones... But now, I kind of miss the bond I have with some of my old pals...
I really can't believe this is happening to me. Not the part about losing old friends, but the part where I actually care and feel it... My gawd, age is really catching up with me...
I'm actually glad that no one reads this blog anymore. Hence, I get to ramble all I want. I keep a blog instead of a diary because I tend to lose stuff and you can't possibly lose an electronic webpage, so yeah. A blog it is.
Amazing how your brain tends to over-work during the holidays out of sheer boredom... It makes me daydream and think about things in my life... and to be intact with reality really scares the hell out of me. All this years I've been living in fantasy land and denial as a form of defense mechanism... But lately, I think I'm able to see reality as it is...
Reality is not nice.... but I guess I'm coming to terms with things...
Anyway, I've been really miserable for years because I've always been focused on the future...
Failed to observe the present as now and a gift....
So, I know it's the 3rd quarter of 2011 and hardly the right time to make resolutions but I pledge to be more involve with living in the present and try to be happier... It's just a matter of perception. Happenings don't determine how happy you are rather it how you perceive it that determines your state if mind.
So, I pledge to see the cup as half full instead of empty...
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