Xoxo...

Blair: As long as I’m with you, I’m Hilary in the White House. And I want to be Hilary, Secretary of State. But with better hair.

( Gossip Girl, Season 4)

Well said Blair.... That's why you're my favorite character in Gossip Girl.

Humans are such complex and illogical beings.

In the past when trouble is your companion, you wish to get rid of it once and for all...

Trade in everything for peace and serenity...

You thought you could live a life of quietness

Yet when trouble cease to exist,

you secretly long for it...

The drama, the tears, the adrenaline rush...

Well maybe, just maybe...

The rocky path is the very ingredient,

Like walking on eggshells...

It's the one thing that keeps you awake...

Coz if you don't, you'll fall off and drown.

I loathe the person that I'm slowly becoming....

Hence, Let's kill her once and for all...

Before she has a chance to transform into that being...

I would never allow myself to lose the edgy-ness in me...

I would rather die than become that person who drowns slowly in the pool...

Either swim or just suffocate urself

Random ramblings...

Can't believe I'm doing this but...

Apparently, it looks like I'm being a lot more involve with my emotional side lately. For one, I think I'm starting to pay more attention to the people around me nowadays. I mean, Who would have thought that I would actually make an effort in contacting and trying to save friendship(s)....

The "me" 2 years ago wouldn't have believed it, in fact, I think she would roll her eyes and laugh at your face...

But it's true.

Lately, I've been thinking that I really am losing people around me because all these years I couldn't careless about people. My life motto was friends and family come and go, just make new ones... But now, I kind of miss the bond I have with some of my old pals...

I really can't believe this is happening to me. Not the part about losing old friends, but the part where I actually care and feel it... My gawd, age is really catching up with me...

I'm actually glad that no one reads this blog anymore. Hence, I get to ramble all I want. I keep a blog instead of a diary because I tend to lose stuff and you can't possibly lose an electronic webpage, so yeah. A blog it is.

Amazing how your brain tends to over-work during the holidays out of sheer boredom... It makes me daydream and think about things in my life... and to be intact with reality really scares the hell out of me. All this years I've been living in fantasy land and denial as a form of defense mechanism... But lately, I think I'm able to see reality as it is...

Reality is not nice.... but I guess I'm coming to terms with things...

Anyway, I've been really miserable for years because I've always been focused on the future...

Failed to observe the present as now and a gift....

So, I know it's the 3rd quarter of 2011 and hardly the right time to make resolutions but I pledge to be more involve with living in the present and try to be happier... It's just a matter of perception. Happenings don't determine how happy you are rather it how you perceive it that determines your state if mind.

So, I pledge to see the cup as half full instead of empty...

Yet another post of the day....

I'm doing a double post because I really don't want to study....

Signs of old age....
I can't remember facts and theory as much as I do in High School.
Signs of old age....

Oh no!!

Anyway, I need to bury my head in 19 chapter worth of Advertising.... My goodness...
Oh hi, Intro to Mass Comm...
No, apparently I haven't forgotten about you....
Yes, Yes... I'll dive into you soon.

Sigh.... apart from that, College has been blissful.
I'm happy.... and since I'm so upset about missing out on the fun in High school.... I'm gonna strecth myself thin during college... I ain't no missing out on no fun no more....

Anyway, on a more emo tone....
I am an emo writer BTW.... so don't complain.

Coming to college made me realise I'm not that good anymore...
I've always been above average in grades and stuff like that... But now, I really think I should improve myself...

Suppose to submit an entry for an essay competition... but I missed the dateline.... WHY oh WHY, Ginny!!!!

It must be because of KUMON... the kids are so smart there, I feel intimidated. But I still love them, they're an adorable bunch....

I have "the" long awaited 2 month holiday later in Nov and Dec....
and I've made a concious decision to not travel so much and stay home to work on my shortcomings....
I really shouldn't go on living my life half full...
It's also a certain subject that I took this semester... It made me aware about the fact that I need to put in more effort, coz I ain't gonna just sail through without failing...

Yes, apparently studying in 5 Alfa made me a little kiasu... which is good in my case coz I normally just couldn't careless....

Anyway, on a more happy side, I am going to Hong Kong again....
And I'm gonna shop, shop and shop!!!!
Really, months of not dressing up is making me sick....
I can't believe myself!!!
For the past 12 months I've been parading my face buck naked without no make up....

I'm ashamed! and Horrified!!

Oh no....

Anyway, I'm gonna hyave to take time out to re-analyse this year's trend before I go shopping...

Api dan keinginan untuk besolek saya sudah membarak semula... (does it make sense)
I guess my BM just went *poof* after SPM....

Owh... 7 minutes behind my studying schedule.... I'm late! I'm late... Off with my head....
Just kidding.... you didn't think I'm that nerdy, did you?!
Oh maybe I am.... Teehee

A year worth of rant...

It's been more than a year since a last updated... I bet no one will be reading it now, hence I can rant to my heart content...

Time flies by, without realising, it's been a little more than a year already. In this short 12+, many have changed... without realising, I've become this being that even I am unable to comprehend... It could be for the better or worse...

Dreams and ambition that I've cherished for years suddenly feel so foreign and insignificant... Maybe I've grown up, maybe I just creased to notice them anymore...

More importantly, I'm starting to feel like a complete different being....

But I guess it doesn't matter, does it? We're obviously a entire different being from what we are when we're kids or in primary school.... Things change, we just fail to notice them...

Talking about school.... I miss high school... Recently I'm becoming more and more depressed and dismayed about the things I did not do in high school...

I blame it on shoujo manga.... read to much and it pollutes your mind making you think, breath and talk unreasonably.... But really, I do miss the times when I was able to skip class and laugh at people jumping over the fence while being chased by teachers, and the various mischevious act that I get into.... Yes, even the sisterhood stick that makes no sense at all...

I'm definetely going to demand that our high school gang meet up soon... I miss them to bits...

See, can believe I'm saying this right.... The ice queen from 1 year ago wouldn't have missed anyone... In fact I didn't, until recently....

What is puberty doing to our brains???!!! I demand an explanation....

Oh wait, I'm not even in that growth period anymore....
dang!!!!

The thing bout Chick Lit

This was written ages ago... found this hidden under piles and piles of stuff in my draft.
Maybe a lil immature, since it's written like so long ago.... but meh, I still like chick lit.

Have you realise that people around you (including yourself) have somehow question the point of reading chick lit... I mean i know some guy friends of mine dismiss chick lit as being plain fluff & empty calories. It's a common perspective that chick lit is somehow of less standard compared to more serious reads....

I for one disagree.... coz I believe that every type of book, be it romance, self-help or horror appeals to different people at different time. For example, when I'm in a sober mood I might want to read something more serious, but when I'm happy and just want a good read it would be something light and fun.

(Yealor.... I can hear faceless whispers commenting that it's cause I'm a bimbo)

By the way, what's wrong with wanting to look good in every occasion? It doesn't make one more inferior or more stupid compare to someone else.... I mean not by outward appearance alone..... It's downright rude to stereotype people without getting to know them first.

I mean I like pastel colors and dresses, does that make me feminine? For all you know I might be the most feminist person on planet earth.

Anyway, back to chick lit and their author..... I find it kind of sad that people like to pick on them.... My point is, do you consider writing a book, getting it publish and sold in major bookstores nationwide as an easy task?? If you do, try writing a short story and get it publish in a newspaper.... Can you do it??

I for one get my brain tangle up when I need to write a 2500 word essay....Let's not go to writing a novel with 30+ chapters... I would rather kill myself and become a cat than attempt to do that.

I for one like reading nothing other that the above as it gives me a sense of joy and in a way it makes me think of that perfect life.... Perfection doesn't happen but HEY! What's wrong with imagining that they do?